Working toward diversity and justice may sometimes seem like a three-ring circus.

Good thing Kathy Reim is in charge, seeing as she actually grew up in one.

Reim, president of the local support group Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gays, or PFLAG, said she learned to appreciate diversity as a young child traveling with her family in a three-ring circus in the Midwest.

Her mother was a flying trapeze artist who also worked with elephants. Reim and her family were surrounded by a plethora of different cultures and people, from dwarfs and gypsies to talented athletes.

Children of the circus often were teased by other children in the towns they visited, Reim said. At the time, the taunting seemed cruel and unexplainable.

But it shaped her life for years to come and helped cement her foundation as a tolerant and understanding teacher.

“It framed my opinion to know that people are different,” Reim said.

Reim, 63, was recently elected as director for the Pacific Northwest region of PFLAG, an organization that promotes the health and well-being of its gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual and questioning (those who are unsure of their gender or sexuality) community members and their families, and end discrimination through education. It has about 500 chapters nationally.

“Our ultimate goal is to work ourselves out of a job,” Reim said. “But I don’t think that’s going to happen for a while.”

As regional director, Reim will communicate with 50 chapters and serve as a liaison between the Pacific Northwest and the organization’s national headquarters in Washington, D.C. In addition, she will participate in four annual meetings with other regional directors.

Reim, a Sedro-Woolley resident, has volunteered as the state coordinator of the group since 2003. The local chapter meets each month in Sedro-Woolley.

Reim is well-known in Skagit County for her efforts to promote tolerance and fight discrimination. She spends much of her time coordinating events for group members and ensuring they have access to social resources and support.

“That’s what I love about her,” said Michael Bonacci, treasurer of Skagit County PFLAG. “She just doesn’t believe in good things, she makes good things happen.”

Bonacci said Reim is an adept teacher, a person who helps others solve their own problems, but doesn’t completely take charge.

“That’s the educator in her,” Bonacci said. “She’s really good at guiding people.”

And she brings years of experience that helps her support those going through some of the same circumstances she’s been through, Bonacci said.

Reim taught middle and high school in Sedro-Woolley for 30 years until she retired in 2000. She became known as an advocate for students and colleagues. She also has served as a mediator with the Skagit County mediation services.

But she didn’t discover her life’s focus until one day in 1990 when her daughter, Rachel, revealed that she is a lesbian. Reim said she and her family tumbled through a deep sense of confusion and despair. They didn’t know where to turn for support.

“We felt on our own,” she said.

But the family overcame the initial shock and decided to throw their support behind Rachel.

In 2001, Reim and her husband, Robert, joined the Skagit County chapter of PFLAG, which provided the family some much-needed support at the time.

“We get through listening to other people’s stories and we have widened our empathy and understanding about transgender and gender-variant people,” Reim said. “… It’s been a very exciting and gratifying experience.”

Reim became more involved in the organization, eventually climbing to the position of president of the local chapter.

She said her experience as a teacher, mediator and activist has made her a perfect fit for the position.

“For me, it’s an opportunity to bring all the skills in every aspect of my life together,” Reim said. “And I get to meet many wonderful people who share common interests and goals.”

Cathy Pfahl, an advisor with the Gay Straight Alliance at Mount Vernon High School, said Reim is quick to support any efforts in support of the LGBTQ community.

When the support club was formed at the high school, Reim “immediately contacted us to see how she could support and help,” Pfahl said.

Reim’s personal experience has provided her with an empathy well beyond “a very deep level for other families,” Pfahl said.

“She’s the heart of (this) movement in the valley,” Pfahl said.

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